Ms. Morgan met me at the car today when I was dropping Gideon off. She asked if I saw Gideon's book from yesterday. Unfortunately, since I have been under the weather, I hadn't. She was so proud of him. She told me that he drew then pictures and told her the order that seeds grow.
I pulled over on the way home to look at the book she mentioned. He had drawn a picture of seeds under the ground, then sprouts, then small plants and then a full plant with flowers. It's so rewarding to see that he is grasping so many things!
This morning his Headstart teacher told me that when Gideon was drawing in his journal that she asked him what he was drawing. He told her "I draw me, I draw me as a fireman when I grow up." She asked him if he needs tools to be a fireman and he proceeded to say, "I have a hose with water, I have a coat with a tank, I have boots and pants and gloves. I have a fire dog, I have a fire extinguisher, and I have cutters to cut through metal to help get people out." She was so impressed that he had a whole plan of what he wanted to do. She then told me that she is getting more out of my 'non-verbal' kiddo, than others that don't have the label developmental delay.
God is good, I really feel that he has a great plan for my Gideon. I am so proud of him. It was only 18 months ago that he was non-verbal, echolalic, and not processing simple commands. What a difference these teachers have made in his life. I am so grateful for the MDO for allowing my special needs child to attend, when they didn't have to. To Ms. Angie for loving Gideon and connecting with him. To Ms. Morgan and her aides, for being patient with Gideon and teaching him. Ms. Gray, the speech therapist, for understanding your specialty and thinking outside the box for Gideon, to the occupational therapist for making therapy fun for Gideon, so he can get better. The Headstart teachers, Ms. Sandra, Ms. Dena and Ms. Maria, thank you for understanding that everyday is a new day with new challenges or milestones and thank you for having an open mind.
Some may think that this is their jobs, I don't feel that way. I feel that they are getting paid for their calling. God Bless you all!
Friday, April 13, 2012
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Heart smiles
This morning upon taking Gideon to school there was a boy about his size there. He was with his mother and they were bringing his sister to school. I can see the haze of Autism on the little boys face, as he is studying the play tools. Gideon walks up to him, they stand as if they are going to have a conversation. No verbal exchanges take place. Then the boy touches Gideon's tummy. The boy is expressionless, I watch to see Gideon's reaction. Gideon begins to laugh, then smiles and says, "I gonna tickle you!" The boy stands there and looks at Gideon.
The mother begins to apologize and explain, I said to her, "I don't want to be rude, but your apology isn't necessary. Your son did nothing wrong, he is a child and learning how to socialize just as my son is. My son struggles with socialization and appropriate language. He was non-verbal until about a year ago. I understand how you feel, but please know, just like the day you held the door for me when Gideon was having a meltdown, you didn't judge me. I don't judge you or your son."
She smiled and said, "Oh thank you." She proceeded to tell me that the day she saw me carrying Gideon is and I was almost shaking, that she knows how embarrassing it is. On that day, Gideon pounced on me while I was driving on a highway and grabbed the wheel to get into my lap. I believe that it was only by a miracle that we didn't hit oncoming traffic or roll the car. I was so scared, I was afraid for what happened and afraid for what was happening in my Gideon. Was this permanent? Thankfully, he was ill and after antibiotics he was fine. Other Autism Moms know these thoughts, they understand the juggling of illness vs. use of antibiotics.
It was nice to be able to reciprocate compassion to someone. Little gestures go a long way. When you see a family struggling, offer to hold a door, help a Mom load groceries in her van, or just extend a genuine smile. The little things keep me sane on some days.
The mother begins to apologize and explain, I said to her, "I don't want to be rude, but your apology isn't necessary. Your son did nothing wrong, he is a child and learning how to socialize just as my son is. My son struggles with socialization and appropriate language. He was non-verbal until about a year ago. I understand how you feel, but please know, just like the day you held the door for me when Gideon was having a meltdown, you didn't judge me. I don't judge you or your son."
She smiled and said, "Oh thank you." She proceeded to tell me that the day she saw me carrying Gideon is and I was almost shaking, that she knows how embarrassing it is. On that day, Gideon pounced on me while I was driving on a highway and grabbed the wheel to get into my lap. I believe that it was only by a miracle that we didn't hit oncoming traffic or roll the car. I was so scared, I was afraid for what happened and afraid for what was happening in my Gideon. Was this permanent? Thankfully, he was ill and after antibiotics he was fine. Other Autism Moms know these thoughts, they understand the juggling of illness vs. use of antibiotics.
It was nice to be able to reciprocate compassion to someone. Little gestures go a long way. When you see a family struggling, offer to hold a door, help a Mom load groceries in her van, or just extend a genuine smile. The little things keep me sane on some days.
Monday, April 9, 2012
The sun always come out after the rain, but sometimes it rains for awhile.
We went to Gideon's parent-teacher conference last week. There is no doubt that his special ed teacher loves him. She smiled everytime she said his name, her eyes twinkled when she talked about being so impressed that he is having intelligble conversations with her and the aides, she was excited for him that he is playing soccer and talks about doing things with his Daddy. All of these I look for, all of these I pray for in a person who is responsible for the few people that I cherish more than myself. As we talked about his gains, there was a looming 'what's coming?' feeling in my gut.
About 15 minutes in, it came... Previously, the expectation was that Gideon would catch up to his peers in language and other areas of development and be in 'normal' classes after. Now, his teacher is recommending that he go to regular kindergarten, have an IEP written for occupational therapy needs, continued speech therapy to work on processing language and go the resource room for a time every day. She doesn't feel that he needs a paraprofessional, but that he does need a regular 'break' from the usual atmosphere.
I am glad that Gideon has people in his life that are able to help him get the most out of his days at school. However, I am sad that he is still behind his peers. I have people trying to tell me to cheer up and be grateful for what I have. I feel like I am, I feel like the majority of the time I am strong and I fulfill my obligation to be parent, educator, cheerleader of my kids. For now, I think I just need some time. I need some time to process MY feelings, grieve MY loss in expectations, and search for MY path to move forward.
So, if you have advice to give. Please save it. We can talk another time. I don't need reaffirmation either. I just need to get back to life in a regular routine and deal in the best way I know how.
About 15 minutes in, it came... Previously, the expectation was that Gideon would catch up to his peers in language and other areas of development and be in 'normal' classes after. Now, his teacher is recommending that he go to regular kindergarten, have an IEP written for occupational therapy needs, continued speech therapy to work on processing language and go the resource room for a time every day. She doesn't feel that he needs a paraprofessional, but that he does need a regular 'break' from the usual atmosphere.
I am glad that Gideon has people in his life that are able to help him get the most out of his days at school. However, I am sad that he is still behind his peers. I have people trying to tell me to cheer up and be grateful for what I have. I feel like I am, I feel like the majority of the time I am strong and I fulfill my obligation to be parent, educator, cheerleader of my kids. For now, I think I just need some time. I need some time to process MY feelings, grieve MY loss in expectations, and search for MY path to move forward.
So, if you have advice to give. Please save it. We can talk another time. I don't need reaffirmation either. I just need to get back to life in a regular routine and deal in the best way I know how.
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